While traveling this past week I received a status update on a project that we thought was already over the finish line, but implementation went badly.  The delay is a disappointment and a little bit of a demotivator.

I really wanted to fire off an angry text message or email that included a nice little tirade.  After all, I was mad.  It was a mistake I would not expect us to make on a project that was high profile internally, but here we are.

Then my rational brain took over.  (Which is surprising since I was also tired)

What would be the value in sending such a message?  It might satisfy my irritation and anger.  It might also further discourage and demotivate those involved with the project.  It would actually do nothing to bring resolution.  It would not actually reduce my stress because the problem would remain.  If I am angry about it, then I put myself into a position of oversight because since it did not meet expectations and I expressed my disappointment, then it indicates to everyone that I now need to know when it is resolved.  They may even want me to review the solution before implementation, which could cause further delay in the solution.  A quickly fired angry response never provides an opportunity for the project owners to resolve the issue on their own.

What would be the value in not sending the message?  Since the project is still high profile, it will probably get lots of attention and get resolved.  If it does not, I can still get involved in a solution and be calm about it.  It if does get resolved, look at my options.  I can praise the employees that fixed it.  I can have a non-judgmental conversation about what we can learn as an organization about the problem and the solution, because in this scenario, I still expect an answer.  I do not take on the stress of the problem, or ownership of the solution.  Most likely, the employee making the mistake and resolving it will become more motivated by their achievement and my praise than would have resulted from my criticism.  If they just solve it everyone wins.

Sounds so wise doesn’t it?

Ahh, but why is being calm so hard?  (That sounds like a good idea for a future post)